Thrush

She's got it...and got it bad. Lexi's little mouth is covered in white yeast. Last week, we noticed some white spots on her tongue and assumed it was milk deposits, as they seemed to lessen when we gave her a few sips of water. However, this last ThursdayI noticed it on the inside of her cheeks. Called the ped and they called in a prescription for her. I've been giving her the meds as prescribed, but the yeast seems to be getting worse, not better. It's on the roof of her mouth, her cheeks, her tongue...uugghh. I know it's going to take a few days for the meds to kick in, but how long? She also spits some of it back out, so I'm worried she's not getting the full effect of the medicine.

I'm also worried a little about the amount of formula she drinks in one feeding. We're lucky we can get 2 ounces into her at a time, 3 ozs is rare, with most feedings being an ounce and a half. As a result, we're still feeding her every 1 1/2 to 2 hours. We can go 3 hours at night most nights. She's gained weight...weighing about 9lbs now (I weigh myself and then weigh again holding her) so she's up 3lbs from her birth weight. How much did your 7 week old take in a feeding if you formula fed?

These are all questions I have to ask her ped...but another mother's experience is just as valuable to me.

Not like me

I'm very upset with myself. I got angry at Lexi today because she wouldn't stop crying. ANGRY at a 7 WEEK OLD! She was in a fussy mood today and nothing I did would console her. I felt myself getting angry at her for not listening when I asked her to please stop crying. Who gets angry at a 7 week old?? I put her down in her pack n play and went upstairs for 5 minutes...and still she cried. When I cooled off, I went back to pick her up and she finally calmed down. But I was so upset with myself for allowing myself to get to a point that I was angry with her. I still am. It's so not like me.

6 weeks

6 weeks past, and 6 more to go...until I return to work. Today marks the half way point in my maternity leave. It's hard to believe that 6 weeks has past already.

Lexi is getting bigger everyday it seems. Yesterday was a hard day. All she wanted was to be held and fed. She would only take 15 - 30 minute cat naps and then want to eat again. I hope this is a growth spurt and not evidence of a new habit of hers. The plus? She slept from 9:15 last night until 1:15. 4 hours straight! That is a big milestone for her. She's been on a 2 hour schedule, and is like a little alarm clock. We've tried to get her to go longer, but she won't eat more than about 2 - 2 1/2 ozs at a time...she'll spit it out.

She also seems to have alot of trouble moving her bowels. She strains and grunts and cries...but her poop isn't hard, so I'm not sure why it's so hard for her to pass it. The ped had told me that it's probably just that she hasn't learned yet how to effectively use the muscles to pass the poop...but wouldn't she have learned that by now? It's so hard to watch her struggle to poop, and then have either nothing come out, or see that it's soft and wonder why it was so difficult for her.

Other than the poop issue, Lexi is a happy, content baby. We're very fortunate.

One month pics

1 month

Today, Alexis turns one month old. She's getting so big and changing everyday. I love watching her sleep. She makes the cutest faces, from grimaces and smiles, to sticking her tongue out and sucking her cheeks in to make a fish face. She had a bath yesterday. I had previously been giving her sponge baths in her little tub, but it was hard to do and I was afraid I'd drop her, and she'd scream the whole time. So last night, I filled our tub about a quarter way and got in, DH then handed me Alexis. We had NO TEARS! She seemed to really like being submerged in the water (I wonder why??). And it was SO EASY to wash her. I was able to lay her on my thighs for support of her body and just hold her head. I didn't feel like I'd drop her. She actually arched her back so that the back of her head was in the water. Not sure if it was voluntary or not, but it was cute. And she was happy. The only tears came when we took her out. I've found a new way to bathe my baby...at least during the times when I have time to take a bath with her!

Mother's Day

I was going to write a Happy Mother's Day post, but I remembered how I felt last year, when I only had a failed IVF cycle to show for my efforts. How I felt when I heard, or read, those sentiments. And I don't want to be the cause of anyone's pain. So instead, I will say Happy Sunday. May you spend this day with those you love, doing something that you love.


**I will have a post about my day today later this week.

Help me remember!

OK internets, I'm searching for a children's album that I used to listen to as a child. It was called "Dandelions Never Roar" I believe. One of the songs started out, "Dandelions never roar, not even just for fun...". I've googled it, but can't find anything on it. Can you help?

4 weeks

I'm finally able to post a "week" post on the actual day! Lexi is 4 weeks old today. The last 28 days have passed in a flash of diapers, formula, pumping and no sleep. But the reward is huge. I love my little girl to pieces. She's everything to me.

Lexi is starting to fill out. She now has chubby baby thighs and cheeks. Newborn clothes actually fit her! No more premeeie clothes!! And she has a few more periods of alertness during the day...I so look forward to those times. She loves her swing and bouncy seat...but HATES to sleep on her back. She will roll herself to her side to sleep. And I can always put her to sleep by lying her on her tummy on my chest.

Here are some pics of Lexi taken today...

I know these are involuntary smiles...but they still melt my heart!!

Hangin in my bouncer!

Hello internets!

Chunky Monkey

Lexi had a pedi appointment today for a weight check. When she went 2 weeks ago the ped was "concerned" because Lexi had only averaged a 0.9 ounce weight gain per day and he likes to see a 1 ounce weight gain per day...Please. My little meatball knocked it out of the park today. She averaged a 2 ounce weight gain per day! She weighed 6lbs 6 1/2 ounces 2 weeks ago. Today? 8lbs 5 ozs! Almost a 2 lb weight gain!

We've also switched her to Similac Sensitive. So we'll see how things go from here with the gas issues. Last night was NOT a good night. Her gas was SO BAD! She had mommy crying! Daddy was flustered as well. We only each slept about 2 hours total...and mine came between 7am and 9am!

So I'm off to take a nap now that Lexi is sleeping!

3 weeks

Miss Alexis is 3 weeks old. She seems to be getting SO big...even though I'm sure she's only about 7lbs now. The clothes she was swimming in before are fitting better, and she's a little more alert during the day. We are having gas issues. She's not a good burper and gets alot of gas in her tummy. She strains and strains to push it out, but it still hurts her. She's on breastmilk and formula, Similac Advanced...I'm thinking of switching her to the Sensitive...

As for me, I think I'm finally healing. The bright red blood stopped a few days ago and I'm no longer as sore where my stitches are. But now the emotional roller coaster begins. Lately, I've been feeling a little blue. I think it has alot to do with the fact that DH is back at work this past week, so I've pretty much been cooped up in the house alone with Lexi for the past 7 days. As the week as worn on, I've found myself letting her cry a little longer than I did before. But those cries make me want to cry as well. 99% of the time, I am able to soothe her, and know what she wants...but the other 1%...well, I don't know whether to pull my hair out or cry with her, or both. I've NOT had any feelings of hurting her, just wanted to state that up front. Just the blues.

I've also been feeling a little jipped. Let me say first, that I love Lexi to death and am SO glad she's here and healthy...but part of me feels jipped out of the last 4 weeks of pregnancy. I never "nested". I never had the anticipation of "are these the real thing". I never had any Braxton Hicks. My labor didn't go as I had wanted. It was a "normal" day and then BOOM, my water broke. I never got to say "Is this it?"...all I said was "This is it". Don't know why I feel this way, I just do. But again, Lexi is everything to me...and if having those last 4 weeks of pregnancy meant she would have had complications or anything, then I'm glad I didn't have them. I'd rather have her.