I should be 35 weeks along with you at this point. I should know if you were a boy or a girl. I should be feeling you hiccuping and kicking. I should have seen your face on ultrasound by now. I should be relishing these next few weeks, because if you were to be like your sister, I could have expected you to arrive next week. I should be shopping for last minute items. I should be packing a hospital bag. I should have a name picked out for you.
Instead, you remain nameless. I don't know if you were a boy or a girl. I never saw your face on ultrasound. I never felt your kicks. But that doesn't mean I don't think of you. I think of you everyday when I see your sister's face and wonder if you would look like her.
You are a part of me. And I miss you everyday.